More pointedly—at the daggers of pain that seem aimed at your own heart—the kind of pain that slices a person in two and leaves you gasping for air?
In the last three weeks my husband and I have felt this pain so intensely, so cutting, that we have taken turns with the tears and uttering words of anguish and anger. They are not directed at each other, but at the sheer horror we feel. I have wanted to pinch myself. Is this for real?
We haven’t wished to pull everyone into our pain, for we know others have pain of their own. But we have experienced another adoption loss. An adoption we didn’t seek, didn’t initiate and in fact very carefully stepped back from, allowing it to unfold purely on the birth mother’s initiative. This was the only way we would even consider it, I had said last year, if someone we knew asked us to adopt their child. [Continue Reading…]